Harry Potter and the Quest for Middle-Earth
by The Winter Wizard
Summary: Chaos and hilarity ensue when Harry Potter crashes the Council of Elrond. How could the quest for Middle-Earth be helped, or hindered, by this sarcastic, unusual wizard with dark secrets and unique powers of his own? Possible Harry/Arwen or Harry/Eowyn, No Slash, crack-fic, severe AU
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** Neither Harry Potter nor the Lord of the Rings belong to me. All copyright is properly owned by their respective owners – Rowling and Tolkien and whoever else they might belong to.

**Author's Note:** Just a quick intro – this fic was inspired by a similar Harry Potter/Lord of the Rings crack fic written by Publicola called Different Strokes for Different Folks. It's hilarious and a must read though it's only one chapter! I always wanted to write a humorous crossover that possibly had Harry romancing Arwen, Eowyn, and even Galadriel. There won't be slash in this fic not that I have problems with it in real life but this fic isn't slash. So enough rambling and let the story begin!

P.S. This is not meant to be Frodo-bashing, just a different unusual spin that I haven't quite seen anywhere on this site. Not saying I'm god or anything but I wanted to be unique. Also, this chapter was meant to be lighter and more humorous but it kind of wrote itself. So now, onto the crossover.

CHAPTER 1: Crashing the Council

Frodo fought down the rising panic in his chest as the Men, Elves, and Dwarves gathered for the Council of Elrond shouted amongst each other in heated voices. Even Gandalf and Lord Elrond themselves had joined the debate, albeit reluctantly, and Frodo did not see how this would end well. In another time, another world, another story, he could well see himself interrupt the argument boldly but nervously at the same time, offering his services to destroy the One Ring.

But he did not know the way, nor did he know if he had the guts to do it. He had taken it thus far but the thought of destroying it made him feel sick to the stomach. He didn't want to admit it aloud for fear of people thinking him corrupted, but he did not want to destroy the Ring. It had grown on him and, truth be told, he knew that the only reason he'd claim to want to destroy it was so that he could hold onto it for a longer time. Of course he actually wanted it destroyed, but his weaker, more selfish side wanted to keep it hidden and safe from the rest of the world.

Frodo knew that if he even _looked_ at the Ring one more time its corruption would be complete and he wouldn't be able to stop himself from snatching it up off that damn pedestal, slipping it onto his finger, and disappearing. He knew these thoughts were wrong and evil and something in the back of his mind told him the Ring was making him think this since it knew the Council was plotting its destruction, but Frodo didn't care. He wasn't as strong as everyone believed he was and could not bear to disappoint him.

No. He needed to get away from the Ring before it bore a hole into his chest that not even time could heal. If he did destroy it, he'd feel empty and hollow inside and would have to leave his friends to wallow in his self-misery alone. He did not want to suffer that fate for he loved the Shire too much. Call it greed or whatever you would but Frodo needed help.

Breathing deeply to calm himself while the Council yammered on, he closed his eyes and rubbed his temples slowly and methodically fighting against the pressure to grab the Ring and disappear from the rest of the world forever. His heart broke as each minute wore on but he called out desperately to the Valar for someone else, another hero, to take up the quest that he could not accomplish.

Suddenly, the ground shook.

A shadow ghosted eerily across the sky blotting out the sun. At first, the Council failed to notice until the ground began shaking faster and faster. A musical voice echoed in the air and the Council cried out in alarm, each cursing and swearing in their native language.

Weapons were armed and the elves readied their spells and enchantments. Gandalf clutched his gnarled wooden staff and pointed it in the air.

Everyone was tense and strained.

An eerie mist rose up from the earth and the sound of desperate, agonized, whispering shrieks arose from the One Ring as it rocked to and fro – as if it was _struggling against something_ – on the pedestal.

"Save us! Save us!" It seemed to be chanted, beseechingly. "The Chosen One has come to destroy!"

The Council waited with bated breath for this dreadful being so powerful that it could make a tool of the Enemy afraid.

For the longest time, nothing happened.

Then, when all seemed normal, there was a loud, ear-splitting _crack_.

A young man with messy black hair, piercing green eyes, and dressed in dark robe appeared in the midst of the Council. Before they could react, the boy pulled out a jewelled, golden sword from his belt, strode over to the Ring and raised the blade high.

They watched in awe and wonder as beams of light pierced the gloom and the sword fell.

A silent clap of thunder echoed throughout Rivendell and the Council cried out in pain as they were all flung backwards by an intense shockwave of raw energy and smoke.

When the fog abated, they dragged their weary and confused selves to their feet and watched in stunned disbelief, not comprehending the sight that greeted them: The boy remained standing, shoulders sagged, head bowed, and sword leaned nonchalantly over one shoulder.

But that was not the shocking part.

The surprise was that the One Ring was destroyed. What was once a powerful tool of the Enemy that could alert His servants to the wearer of the Ring and render the Wearer invisible and make it a Black Rider, albeit a lesser one, was now a circle of shattered gold pieces.

Far off into the distance, one could hear a loud cry of agony that echoed throughout Middle-Earth for at least one whole hour.

When the Council finally regained their senses, Lord Elrond stepped forward in awe and wonder looking reverently into their saviour's eyes.

"Who are you, oh great one?" He asked curiously.

The boy turned and gave the elf lord a wry grin.

"I go by many names," He chuckled. "Some know me as the Boy Who Lived, The Chosen One, or the Man Who Conquered or even Lord Black. But I hate titles and fame so I would appreciate it if you call me Harry Potter. Now then, enough pleasantries. If you don't mind, I have a few ideas how to handle that traitor wizard Saruman and the Eastern/Southern foes. Let's continue the meeting, shall we?"

**To Be Continued**

**A/N: **Thoughts? Tips? Suggestions? Reviews? Leave one or two and you might see another chapter faster than you thought. I have some free time on hand so I will redeem the time by updating as much of this story as possible. Many thanks in advance!


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: **See chapter one! Same rules apply.

**A/N:** My theory about how the Ring was destroyed was that basically it was a Horcuxe that Sauron made to keep himself alive and I'll explain more about that later. It's similar to how Voldermort survived. Glimly couldn't destroy the Ring since his axe was a normal weapon but Harry was using the Sword of Gryffindor to destroy it and that could also destroy a Horcuxe in his world. And I decided to make it into a multi-chapter story in case anyone read the long A/N at the bottom of the page of the last chapter. Sorry about that! Enough rambling though and let the next update begin.

CHAPTER 2: Plan B-room

Instantly, the confused, dazed, and disoriented Council members began arguing back and forth amongst each other while Gandalf and Elrond began attempting to bring back law and order to the meeting.

Harry Potter sighed.

He knew they would never believe him and would not trust him ever again. He should have waited and asked for their permission to destroy the Ring but it had to be done.

Then again what had he really helped by destroying it?

He didn't really know if the threat in Mordor was truly finished or if it was just the movie-verse that had the whole place destroyed. He'd have to look that up again in the Pensieve he brought along with him in his bottomless satchel, handy thing that.

Giving himself a mental shake, he glanced over at Frodo and saw him smiling in relief and looking a lot better than he had been. He was almost crying, poor fellow. The Ring's destruction had obviously shook him up.

Thanks to the Horcuxe in his head being removed, Harry had discovered his eyesight vastly improved to the extent that he no longer needed glasses. In fact, his eyesight was so powerful it could see things most couldn't which was one reason why he was a Seeker at Hogwarts.

Because of the Horcuxe-removal, this was amplified almost ten-times more. He didn't have elvish eyesight like Legolas or whatever, but he could see pretty damn well and spotted a few certain Hobbits hiding in the bushes watching the Council with glee.

Harry stifled a chuckle and looked around for Boromir. The Steward's son looked murderous and Harry couldn't blame him. His chance for greatness had been ruined and he couldn't fulfil his father's secret mission now. He would have to ride home in shame and report that the threat had been dealt with. His father would be furious and would probably give some trivial glory or honour to his younger brother just to spite him, since Denethor was that kind of miserable little man.

Boromir was currently arguing with Legolas and Aragorn who were trying to calm the huge warrior. Harry had nothing against him really but he didn't like the fact that he tried to steal the Ring from Frodo. He was the most human character out of them all really and felt sad that he would never prove his worth as a champion by attempting to rescue Merry and Pippin from those Orcs.

So much had been averted and changed that anything could happen now. Even _if_ Sauron had been completely exterminated and Mordor was whipped out for once and for all, there was still Isengard to contend with as well as those Southern/Eastern people. Saruman was breeding his own army of Uru-Kai and they were definitely a threat to be dealt with.

Hopefully, destroying the One Ring had given him some power here so he could convince the elves and dwarves to join forces with Men and NOT wall themselves in at Helm's Deep. While it was an epic battle, so many lives were wasted and that could be changed too. Plus, the city didn't need to be trashed by the Orcs.

While the Council was arguing, Harry's mind was a whirl already plotting a myriad of ideas to destroy Isengard. He could try to convince the Ents to help him but without Merry and Pippen leading them to where the trees were being chopped he doubted that could work.

The easiest thing would be to travel to the dam himself on his broomstick and using his Invisibility Cloak to elude the Orcs, Trolls and other guards. There were also the Ring Wraiths to defeat if they weren't already destroyed by the Ring's destruction. If not, they would be severely weakened and could be taken out by Fiend Fire or a water charm like Aqua Eructo or the similar spell, Aguament. He could also use attempt to cast a Patronus but didn't know if that would work since they weren't Dementors.

All of a sudden, however, his train of thought was instantly interrupted by a loud rustling noise and the clang of spears. He stiffened and whirled around only to see a row of spears, axes, bows and arrows surrounding him. Harry sighed. He knew this was an option. Fear of the unknown was a powerful motivator and the Council didn't trust him, not yet. Once they saw the true extent of his handy-work they might.

Or he'd have to escape to another universe and try things out a little slower next time. Narnia was a popular choice that sprung to mind, or the land of Alagaësia.

"I am sorry, Harry Potter," Lord Elrond said sadly. "But we have decided that it is not safe for you to walk free. You will not be a prisoner but we must see for ourselves if Mordor and the Lord of the Rings is truly destroyed. If you have defeated him, then you shall be hailed as a hero and thusly rewarded along with your freedom and our trust. But for now, you must remain in our _care._ Do we understand one another?"

Harry grimaced.

"Sorry, Ely," Harry retorted, forcing a smirk. "Saruman won't wait around for you guys to make up your minds. He's breeding an army of Orcs more powerful than the normal ones as I speak. He has his own spy amongst a Court of Men and already one of your own gathered here is not truly as he seems and would have tried to take the Ring for his own if I had not interfered. Sadly, I cannot afford to wait in your care just yet although I would love to stay here and flirt with some of your hot elf maidens. Say hi to Arwen for me would you? Unfortunately, I have pressing matters to attend to and there are messes that need to be cleaned up. But I shall return when you trust me again and take all the time you want to investigate. One last thing: I would avoid going into the Mines of Moria at all cost unless you want to face hordes of goblins and a Balrong and I wouldn't want to seek refuge in Helm's Deep unless you want it bombed to pieces."

Pausing to catch his breath from his long-winded speech, he was interrupted by a harsh laugh that came from none other than Boromir.

"One does simply not walk out of a ring of steel," He drawled. "How do you propose to escape our grasp?"

The others nodded and murmured their agreement but Harry only chuckled. He decided they needed to see just how powerful he was and decided to throw them a bone of his own.

While he was distracting them with his speech, he was carefully pulling his shrunken broomstick and wand from his pocket. His Cloak was already flung over his back but was Charmed by a spell in the Black Library at Grimmault Place to keep it from being activated until he pulled the hood over.

"Just like this," He smirked and chanted, "_Finite!"_

Instantly, the broom expanded into its full size and Harry hopped on it swiftly. Years of instinct as a Seeker kicked in and he soared into the air in seconds leaving behind a row of flabbergasted elves, men, and dwarves who were frozen in shock, their spears, swords, and axes now useless.

Harry didn't want to reveal his Invisibility Cloak just yet though so he decided to pull a different trick out of his sleeve and yelled _"Protego!"_

Shocked at the sudden cry, a young elf archer accidentally released an arrow that had been pointed skywards towards the Chosen One.

"No!" Gandalf cried. "He has magic!"

But it was too late.

The arrow shot forward only to bounce uselessly off Harry's shield, barely causing a dent. It was one of the simpler Shield Charms and was used to taking heavy rapid fire from Dark Wizards, even the Killing Curse. A puny arrow, even made by the elves, was child's play compared to what it was used to.

"So long, friends!" Harry called, feigning a cheerful attitude. "I wish I had gotten to know you better but duty calls and I must obey its command. I shall inform you of Saruman and Isengard's destruction in a letter delivered by a white owl. Try not to harm her please. She almost saw death once already trying to save my life. Fair well!"

**To Be Continued...**

**A/N:**


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